ARCHIVE: Nine (better late than never)

Kate enjoying a cake pop on May 15th!
Kate enjoying a cake pop on May 15th!

Well here we are again, sweet girl. Mommy’s late with a blog post. Before motherhood & cancer, I’ll have you know that your momma wasn’t usually ever late for ANYthing, but you might not ever catch a glimpse of that. My how times have changed!

May 15th marked our 9th month with cancer. I’m happy to report that the reason this post is late is because the milestone truly did pass this month without that sharp pain in my chest of the memories. For the first time in a LONG time, I didn’t wake up remembering just what it was like that day, or mourn the loss of your sweet innocence. We woke up…normally.

Normal means something different now, for sure. We now talk about things like tubie drinks and creamy, leg pokies and prizes. Your play time with others comes in large part at the clinic and thank GOODNESS you really love being there. We talk about pills and doctors and check ups, but now, we also talk about story time, the library, being outside, planting flowers, running errands and birthday parties. We are slowly getting into the swing of life again and are doing so with relative ease, albeit a slow start.

We’ve officially been “at” this cancer thing for longer than I was even pregnant with you, which is just crazy to me. That felt like a lifetime…treatment has felt like…well, eternity.

As the one-year anniversary comes closer into view, I find myself reflecting a lot about the girl you were and the girl you now are. I marvel at how tall you are…how skinny your legs are!! I stroke the soft hair that is starting to take shape on your sweet head and remember when I did the very same thing, holding you in my arms as a baby. Your cheeks still resemble those of the baby we diagnosed 9 months ago, but your smarts and humor remind me very much that you are a whole new kind of awesome in this little person’s body. The eyebrows may be mostly gone, but the kind and inquisitive expression behind your eyes remains.

Here we go baby girl…we’re on our way to great things. I love you, I love you, I love you.

My cup runneth over,

Mommy

 

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