Today

I don’t think it would come as any surprise to anyone that after suffering a loss so staggering, so life-altering, so out of the blue…finding anything to be thankful for or feeling particularly blessed by would be a struggle.
And it is. Do not let this post fool you. IT. IS. A. STRUGGLE.
But.

I sit here on a beautiful Saturday morning, my news feed, text feed & PM feed full of friends and loved ones sharing stories of Kate’s “nearness,” and how random people in THEIR lives stop to talk to them….about her. How they feel she’s looking over their little ones, looking over their well-being and keeping watch over EVERYone she loves; not just us.
I am so grateful that people share these stories and thoughts with me. I am so thankful that she remains on the minds and in the hearts of others; even those we don’t know. I am so blessed to know she was mine. Ours.
I sit here with coffee in hand, casually chatting with my friend & partner in crime about our upcoming event, sharing emails all morning, working together to create an amazing experience for a whole lot of people and I feel such pride and such happiness.
I am so grateful that Kegs & Corks chose US to benefit from the event this year. I am so thankful that because of this little girl and her beloved hero, 150+ guests will join together in a few weeks to raise awareness, give back and have fun. I am so blessed to know she was mine. Ours.
These feelings (any feelings of positivity, if I’m being honest) are extremely hard and come with an awful lot of guilt in this world I live in. Nothing feels good without the immediate feeling of sadness or longing to follow it. Joy doesn’t exist without pain. I am no longer content or “happy”…I just sort of “am.”
But today, I am grateful. I am thankful. I am blessed.
Grateful for the love, support and kindness of others who believe in us and in our mission. Thankful for the chance to shout from the rooftops about my beloved and why our kids should matter more. And blessed to know she was mine. Ours.
And she always, always will be.
Yes…I think that today? I am grateful. I am thankful. I am blessed.

1 thought on “Today”

  1. I never had the honor of meeting your precious little Kate, i followed her Journey and she was such a brave little girl, she is always on my mind. In my prayers as well as you and Kate’s daddy. I can’t imagine what you go through on a daily basis. Kate is so precious just a happy little girl. She would be so proud of everything that you have done and still doing.

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